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Are you looking for love in the wrong places?

Happy Monday!

Last weekend, I met someone. The moment I saw him, I fell in love with him. He had a beautiful smile and he looked charming even from afar.
Then our eyes met. It was love at first sight. I felt the connection was instant and authentic. It was a magical moment. I smiled at him and he flashed back his biggest smile at me.
On Saturday afternoon, I saw him sitting on the bench in the middle of a beautiful, lush forest garden. He smiled at me so I walked up to him and sat beside him. And that’s when we really bonded.
Close open, close open. Pick a booo! Bulagaaaaaaa!
 
Oh yes, I fell in love with this 6-month old baby boy Gino.
Why did I share that story?
Two things:
 
First… Love is not just romantic love.
My love for 6-month old baby boy Gino was obviously not romantic. Yet, his presence made my heart sing and dance. I felt God’s love through this little baby boy who I met for the first time.
The mistake we make is to think of romantic love only when we talk about love. This is the reason why many people jump from one romantic relationship to another to get the love they think they need, only to be left broken and empty.
Recently, I read this book written by my friend Maan Mencias. The title of the book is “Why is My Forever Taking Forever?” You may check it out at kerygmabooks.com. I highly recommend you read the book.
Love is everywhere. We can experience love from our parents, siblings, friends, colleagues, the person who smiled at you while commuting to work, the guard who made sure the building you are working for is safe, the kind lady who cleans the restroom, the cashier who served you, and so on. We can experience love through the wind that gently kisses our face, the sun that gloriously shines for us, and so on.

Second… Not everything you see on social media is (entirely) true.

If I didn’t complete the story and I left you hanging, you would assume that I’m talking about romantic love, right?

That’s the same with social media. The story is not complete.

Then you might form conclusions — some positive, some negative.
My heart bleeds for people, especially teens, who immerse themselves in social media and who feel sorry for themselves because they tend to compare their worst selves with the highly filtered posts of their friends or the people they know.
You see a picture of a happy couple and you’d assume that their love story is perfect. But you don’t know the entire story. Who knows? They just posed for a nice photo, posted it on instagram and they kept on looking at their phones during their entire dinner.
You see a picture of your friend in Japan with caption #blessed #travelgoals. But what you didn’t know was when she got back from her vacation, she had to work overtime for 6 months to pay off the debts she accumulated for that nice vacation.
You may see a picture of your friend who may look like she had it altogether. But what you don’t know is that behind the happy smile, she is struggling to find her real passion.
If you find yourself immersing in social media, seeing all these highly filtered photos proclaiming perfect lives and you feel pressured to step up, you’re not alone. Many people fall into that trap. Sometimes I fall into that trap, too.

Remember this, what you see on social media is not entirely true. It’s only a tiny fraction of what was really happening in that person’s life. Thus, that information is not enough to form sound conclusions.

One solution is to practice social media detox.
From time to time, I do that. Last week, I practiced social media detox. I deleted the FB, messenger, and IG apps on my phone. Then I only allotted only about 10 minutes a day to check all these 3 social media accounts. I put my phone on timer, and once the 10 minutes is up, I stop.
The result? I felt I had more time.
Case study: On Wednesday, February 13, I felt I suddenly had more time. At 2PM, I was asking God what He wanted me to do. I asked Him how I can make other people feel loved and special on Valentine’s Day.
Then the idea of doing a Valentine Sale came to mind. I acted on it right away. I brainstormed with our Marketing Manager Clarice and within a few minutes, the idea was concretized. And that’s how we had the 3-Day Valentine Sale.
This is what I love about social media detox. It removes the clutter and as Dr. Cal Newport said, it allows you to do deep work.
Here’s a TED video of Dr. Cal Newport titled “Quit Social Media.” It now has 17 million views on youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3E7hkPZ-HTk
Sometimes we look for love in material things, romantic love, success, affirmation of people, social media likes, and so on.
But the best love can be found in the Author of Love, Himself. His love for us is so magnanimous, crazy even. He is madly in love with us. There is no shortage in the love He can give us, only shortage in our capacity to receive love.
Romantic love is beautiful. The love of our family is heartwarming. Praise from friends can make our hearts flutter. Think of the most loving person you’ve ever met and think of the most loving act you’ve ever received from someone. Yet, nothing compare to God’s love. As Fr. Michael Esparza said, “God’s love easily surpasses the best of human loves.”
Last Feb 15-17, I went on a 3-day date. It was so beautiful, peaceful, joyful. I had a date with the greatest love of my life — Jesus. I went on a 3-day silent retreat in this charming retreat place inside a huge lush forest garden in Laguna. I do this every year, on Valentine week. 
 
That’s where I met this cute 6-month old baby boy Gino. His mom brought Gino with her to the retreat because Gino needed to be breastfed. Such a loving act of the mom.
 
I wish you a beautiful week ahead! Remember to draw love from the Greatest Lover of All, the One who is truly, madly, deeply, in love with you.
 

I wish you success and happiness!

Sha

P.S. Are you based in Manila? My friend Dreus Cosio and I are conducting a half-day public speaking workshop for introverts. This is happening on Feb 23, Saturday in Alabang. You can get the details here http://bit.ly/swforintroverts Hope to see you there! 🙂
P.S.S. Do you have dreams you want to achieve? Download this FREE eBook “How to Make Your Dreams Come True” with a review by Brian Tracy. Simply go to http://shanacino.com/dreams
Sha Nacino is a trusted global speaker on gratitude, happiness, and productivity. She is the founder of the HR Summit Global™, Overseas Filipinos Summit™, and Global Authors Summit™. She enjoys writing books, giving talks, and teaching people how to write books through her 90-Day Book Writing Challenge which she shares at shanacino.com/write
If you wish to invite Sha to speak in your company or event, you may reach Sha atinfo@shanacino.com or 0915-6229212

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Sha Nacino is one of the most sought-after Filipino motivational speakers in the Philippines. She is the bestselling author of the books Money&Me, Mission Happiness, plus 7 other books. Sha is the founder of The 90-Day Book Writing Challenge where she helps first time authors write their books. She also writes for Bo Sanchez's TrulyRichClub newsletters. She regularly gives talks on Personal Finance, Happiness, Purpose, Success Principles, etc. If you wish to invite Sha to speak in your company or events, visit shanacino.com or email her at sha@seminarphilippines.com.

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Sha Nacino is one of the most sought-after Filipino motivational speakers in the Philippines. She is the bestselling author of the books Money&Me, Mission Happiness, plus 7 other books. Sha is the founder of The 90-Day Book Writing Challenge where she helps first time authors write their books. She also writes for Bo Sanchez's TrulyRichClub newsletters. She regularly gives talks on Personal Finance, Happiness, Purpose, Success Principles, etc. If you wish to invite Sha to speak in your company or events, visit shanacino.com or email her at sha@seminarphilippines.com.

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